Collections of Sardarji Humor

Bristir Chhonde · #1 (**permalink**) 06-27-2007, 05:35 AM

Interviewer: what is your birth date?
Sardar: 13th October
Which year?
Sardar: Oye ullu ke pathe _ _ _ EVERY YEAR
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After returning back from a foreign trip, sardar asked his wife,
Do I look like a foreigner?
Wife: No! Why?
Sardar: In London a lady asked me Are you a foreigner?
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One tourist from U.S.A. asked to Sardar: Any great man born in this
village???
Sardar: no sir, only small Babies!!!
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Lecturer: write a note on Gandhi Jayanthi
So Sardar writes, 'Gandi was a great man, but I don't know who is Jayanthi.
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ___

When sardar was traveling with his wife in an auto, the driver adjusted mirror. Sardar shouted, 'You are trying to see my wife? Sit back. I will drive.
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Sardar was doing experiment with cockroach, first he cut it's one leg and told WALK. WALK. Cockroach walked. Then he cut it's second leg and told the same. Cockroach walked. Then cut the third leg and did the same. At last he cut it's fourth leg and ordered it walk! But cockroach didn't walk. Suddenly sardar said loudly, 'I found it. If we cut cockroach's four legs, it becomes deaf.
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ___

Sardar went in a hotel. To wash hands he went to the washbasin. There he started washing the basin. Seeing this, the manager asked what was he doing. Sardar pointed towards the board ' WASH BASIN '
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Interviewer: just imagine your in 3rd floor, it caught fire and how will
you escape?
Sardar: its simple. I will stop my imagination! !!
_________ _________ _________ ___
Sardar to his servant: Go and water the plants.

Servant: It's already raining.

Sardar: So what take an umbrella and go.
__________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ___

Sardar found the answer to the most difficult question ever -

What will come first, Chicken or egg?

O Yaar, what ever U order first, will come first.
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ___

A teacher told all students in a class to write an essay on a cricket match.

All were busy writing except one Sardarji.

He wrote 'DUE TO RAIN, NO MATCH!'

Bristir Chhonde · #2 (**permalink**) 06-27-2007, 05:36 AM

Postman: - I Have To Come 5 Miles to Deliver U This Packet

Sardar: - why did U come so far. Instead U could Have posted it....
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A Sardar & his wife filed an application for Divorce.

Judge asked: How'll U divide your kids, U'VE 3 children?

Sardar replied: Ok! We'll apply NEXT YEAR
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Sardar's wish: when I die, I wanna die like my Grandpa who died peacefully in his sleep not Screaming like all d passengers in d car he was Driving.
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ___

A Teacher lecturing on population:

'In India after every 10 secs a women gives birth to a kid. '

A Sardar stands up- 'We must find & stop her!. '
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ___A man: 'Sardarji, tell me, why Manmohan Singh goes for a walk in the

evening not in the morning?'

Sardarji: ''Arey bhai Manmohan is PM not AM''.
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ___

Sardar visits Chinese friend dying in hospital.

The Chinese friend just says 'CHIN YU YAN' and dies.

Sardarji goes to China to find the meaning of his friend's last Words. And finds it means 'U R STANDNG ON the OXYGEN TUBE!'
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ___

Sardarji was standing in front of the mirror with his eyes closed.

His wife asked what you are doing.

He said-I am seeing how I look while sleeping.
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ___

Why did Sardar cut the sides of the capsule before taking it?

Guess what...

To avoid side effects!!!
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Man: Sardarji where were U born?

Sardarji: Punjab .

Man: Which part?

Sardar: Oye part part kya kar raha hai, whole body Is born in Punjab Yaar'.
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ___

Lawyer to Sardar: 'Gita pe haath rakhkar

kaho ke...... '

Sardar :'Yeh kya, sita pe haath lagaya to court mein Bulaya. Ab fir

gita pe haath!!'

Bristir Chhonde · #3 (**permalink**) 06-27-2007, 05:42 AM

____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ___

A Sardar saw a beautiful girl... He went and kissed her....

Girl said- 'What R U doing...?'

Sardar replied- '

B.COM

from Khalsa college, Chandigar'
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Sardar: For the past one week a girl is disturbing Me. I don't know how she got my no, she interrupts whenever I call someone and says 'please recharge your card'
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A person went into the office kitchen one morning and found a Sardarni painting the walls. She was wearing a new fur coat and a nice denim jacket. Thinking this was a little strange, he asked her why she was wearing them rather than old clothes or an overall. She showed him the instructions on the tin, 'For Best Results put on Two Coats'
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A sardar was drawing money from ATM,

The sardar behind him in the line said, 'Ha! Ha! Haaa! I've seen ur password. Its 4 asterisks (****). '

The first sardar replies, 'Ha! Ha! Haaa! U R wrong, Its 1258'
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Q

How do U recognize a sardar in school or College???

A

They are the ones who erase their notebooks when the teacher erases the blackboard.. . BOLO tarara!!

____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ___Q

Why did the sardarji sleep with a scale?

A

Because he wanted to measure how long he has slept....... .

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Santa Singh MBBS

After finishing his MBBS, Dr. Santa Singh starts his Own practice. He checked his first patient's Eyes, then the tongue, and finally the Ears using a torch. Finally he said Battery is Ok!!!

Bristir Chhonde · #4 (**permalink**) 06-29-2007, 03:56 AM

Two sardars were fixing a bomb in a car.
Sardar 1 : What would you do if the bomb explodes while fixing.
sardar 2 : Dont worry, I have one more!!!

Sardar : What is the name of your car ?
Lady : I forgot the name, but is starts with "T".
Sardar : Oye Kamaal ki gaadi hai, Tea se start hoti hai. Hamaara gaadi petrol se start hoti hai.

Sardar was busy removing a wheel from his auto. A man asks sardar why are you removing a wheel from your auto.
sardar : Cant you read the board. Parking is only for 2 wheeler.

Sardar joined new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the computer. Boss was happy and asked what you did till evening. Sardar : Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it alright.!!!

Museum Administrator: That's a 500-year-old statue u've broken. Banta: Thanks God! I thought it was a new one.

At the scene of an accident a man was crying: O God! I have lost my hand, oh! Santa: Control yourself. Don't cry. See that man. He has lost his head. Is he crying?

Banta: U cheated me.Shopkeeper: No, I sold a good radio to u. Banta: Radio label shows Made in Japan but radio says this is all India Radio!

Tourist: Whose skeleton is that?Santa: Tipu's skeleton. Tourist: Whose that smaller skeleton next to it?Santa: That was Tipu's skeleton when he was child