Poetry - Bijoy Dibosh 2007 Contest

[Gemini]

OH MAN. You guys are NOT making things easy for me I've said this in the Photography section...and I'll say it again. I don't feel that I have the ability to judge the thoughts and creativity that went in to express the raw emotions which define us as a Nation, a FREE (ideally) nation. "Shesh pata". Khubi chotto ekta kobita. But it carries a lot of weight. But I like "Abar juddho hok" the most because quite frankly, we need another war to end the current one.

[Chocolate]

good job evryone...
voted..

[oYn]

Shesh Pata khub bhalo lagse

Diner Shesh er baccha ta je kina shadhinotar kichui bujhe na tar perspective theke hoito tar babar fire ashata onek beshi important shadhinotar theke. Shohid der family ra je sacrifice koreche amader ajker ei shadhinotar pichone, ei kotha ta onek shomoi mathai ashe na, ei poem ta porle eishob chinta mathai ashe.

Abar Juddho hok ei poem tar ei 4 line awesome :

Bangladesh kothai tomar shei shontanera?
Deke tolo tader........Shei Oshim shahoshi birder
Jagau tader ghum theke..........
Abar juddho hok...........

Baki gula shomondhe pore post korbo

[PraNTiK]

darun likhese shobai

[depression_within]

Abar Juddho Hok, Na Lekha Diary'r Pata, Shesh Pata Ai 3ta just ODBHUT SHUNDOR!! ODBHUT!!!!!!!!! Diner Sheshe tay onek cute kore chondo milano. Shadhinota'r Shopno tao onnek shundor!! Road to Victory te o vote diyechi. Shobai onek koshto koreche ai contest tar jonno!!

[Addabaj]

Soob gula kobitai to sundor konta chere kontay vote kori

[angelmorn]

ekta baaje lekha nai ken ?! tahole uitare pochaitam - ami toh proshongsha korar word khuje pachi na !

My Vote goes to "Diner Sheshe" and "Shadhinota".

I liked The Last Child but it seemed as if it lacked something. Shesher Pata was small, simple and pretty good !

Great job everyone

[PraNTiK]

Abar Juddho Hok!!!
---> kobita ti te ami chhondo khuje pai ni, khubi dukkho jonok, naming er khetre bolbo, exclamation sign er bahullota, tachhara bivinno jaygay dot sign er bahullotao dekha jay. -- goddo kobita hishebe bolte hoy, motamuti elomelo kobita ti, hoyto aro kichhu bola jeto.
--in the end, finishing tay ami oneek kichhu miss korechhi -- say--
last 3ta line -- gorje uthuk bangla...
hingsro thaba boshiye dik shei poshuder buke
na hole ze ei bijoy potakar jonmotai britha hoye jabe!!!!

last e jodi emon hoto --- gorje uthuk bangla...
hingsro thaba boshiye dik shei poshuder buke
na hole ze ei bijoy potakar jonmotai zabe britha!!!!

-- may sounds good now!
i'm so sorry seeing imbalance!


Amar Mayer Dirghoshash
---> shesh line tay to dari debar kotha, anyway eta marginal, kintu ei kobita ti oneek standard hoyechhe, tobe je golpo ti ei kobitar moddho diye shuru holo, hotat kothay jeno udhao hoye giyechhe, oshompurno mone hoyechhe.

tarporeo bolte hoy eti khub valo ekta kobita, Just upto standard


Dekhini Onek Kichu
---> ami jani nah, dari komahin ei shundor kobita ta ke ami koi sthan dibo, besh darun ekta kobita, khub simple kintu je shur diye shuru hoyechhe tar chhotto shomadhan sheshe paoa gechhe, "tokhon je amar jonmoi hoyni"
ekti pori-purno goddo kobita kintu dari komahin



Diner Shehshe
---> jevabe shuru hoyechhe, thik shevabe shesh hole khub valo hoto, ami obosshoi bolbo, ei kobitay, jeta asha kora jeto tar kono kichhui paoa jay ni, karon prothom 8line khub valo jeye, shesh 5 line e giye shob rule vengechhe, shob golamal pakiye gechhe, chhondo chhilo shundor, kintu holo shob gorbor, ekoi vabe, ekoi vabe amaro prosno roye gelo -- KE ELO???


Na Lekha Diaryr Pata
---> ei kobita te je golpo ti fute uthanor cheshta hoyechhe, ami bolbo na je eta bartho cheshta hoyechhe, valoi hoyechhe, kintu BELOW STANDARD! karon bohu jayga tei, kobitar vasha sruti modhur chhilo nah



Road to Victory
---> 3 line verse! RUSSian koekjon poet chhilen jara kina ei dhoroner kobita likhe obvostho, maximum poem guloi hoy erup, 3/4 line er, ebong ei kota line diye tara oneek kichhu bujhiye thaken, orthat, tader oi guloke BANI bolle vul hoy, tara eguloke kobitai bolen. ja hok ei 3ti line niye vaabte amar besh shomoy legechhe, ebong ei kobitar moddhe besh abeg, protishodher gorom onuvuti fute uthese, ei ja.
-- ami jani nah, amader desher prekkha pote -- etake ki kobita bola cholbe kina???



Shadhinota
---> [well, bijoy dibosh theme er upor shwadhinotar kobita ta porte kemon lagchhe, jani nah -- kidding]
ei kobita te oneeek tempo achhe, chhondo achhe besh, ebong ektai ovab, shobder oprotulota, i guess eti kobitar standard ke chhute pare emon ekti kobita.
darun!



Shadhinotar Shopno
---> same kotha -- bijoy dibosh theme er upor shwadhinotar kobita ta porte kemon jeno lagchhe

however, must say, eti emon ekta kobita jeta theke ami shob kichhu pete pari, ei kobitar writer ke ami bolbo BRAVO and BRAVO and AWESOME!!!

ekhon kar dine ei dhoroner kobita paoa mushkil, shobai je adhunik hoye giyechhe, so kobita na jani INVISIBLE type er hoye jay kokhon! great work!!

i salut this poet!

just one prob -- theme ta, eta ke ki BIJOY dhore neoa jay



Shesh Pata
---> 6ti line e shajano ei chhotto chhora-kobita besh besh besh shundor hoyechhe, jodi keu etake valo vabe bekkha-bissleshon koren, tobe bujhte parben, kobitar mormo ta kotto JOTIL



The Last Child
---> i must give gratitute to this poet, i read wordsworth, keats, frost, brownings, shakespeares and so on, but I have lack of ideas on ENGLISH poetical grammar, very sorry that, I cant judge this one very well
however, story within the poem is really nice, liked it

[Severus]

PraNTiK should get an award for displaying proper criticism

[Ashfaq]

Next year e prantik bhaia ke best judge er award deya uchit