Thoughts of a Chaotic Mind

[Gemini]

Tuesday
May 20, 2008
1:12 AM

Deen ta (well technically it's tuesday and am talking about monday) prochondo baje bhabe shuru hoyechilo. It was one of my hellish days to date Tobe shesh hoye jacche bhaloi bhaloi...eituk shanti.

Bondhu gular shathe chorom adda marlam....Faislur chokhe shesher deeke bidaay newar shomoy chokhe ektu osru o dekhlam hoyto. Amake chhere jete or ichhe korche nah...Naah eshob kotha baad. 4 ta deen ache matro...I will not think about leaving home or anyone or anything. I am not LEAVING...am just stepping onto another stage of life Mon kharap korbo nah.

Achha amar mathay ekta proshno ghurchhe. Jei proshno ta ghurchhe sheyta niye ekta thread o achhe ei forum e. If you find out something..do you speak about it and risk stuff or keep ur mouth shut and forever hold your peace?
Ekhon eitar uttore bola jae "Depends on what one finds out ". DUH. Obviously. Ekhon ditiyo proshno hocche....what if it's something....pretty important and is related to a few lives? What do you do? Ekhon abaro bola jete pare "Well...depends on what and whose lives are we talking about". Let's just say...its something that is important. WHAT would YOU do? Speak up and risk it or shut up forever and hold the peace?

Mathay majhe majhei erokom random jinish ghure.....

[Addabaj]

you have to do whatever you think best, but my suggestion is - if it's a matter of someones life, or keeping the thing you discovered inside you will maintain the peace, keep it as a secret. maybe someday you will thank god that he gave you the power to keep this thing inside you, and you will definitely feel good on that time.
God bless

[Gemini]

Ami amar kotha bolchilam na...just general stuff Then again in most situations, it's better to have
a clear conversation. Er por hoyto dekha jae je situation ta jotota worse bhabsilam ashole totota nah....

[Addabaj]

Anyway .. uypodesh dite to poysha laagena, tai diya dichi
Tui ki bilai kinchish? Book shelf? Ami dei?

[rongon]

logically and practically "it's better to have a clear conversation." .. so, basically u got the answer to ur question.. .... but reality is slippery ... amra bolte chaileo , situation may demand "not being able to let it out" .... ....

tomar shomoy baki r 3 days... ekhon e dhoroner chinta kom koro baap......

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nicher para Ta haate shomoy na thakle porar dorkar nai... khub e un-necessary and random thought...
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tobe personally amar kache mone hoy "na bola, na paowa, na jaowa, na kora, na chowa, na dekha, na shona etc etc etc " er sensory perception "bola,paowa, chowa, dekha, shona etc etc etc " er cheye onek beshi TRUE, long LATING, ETERNAL... coz, jokhon amra ekta kichu bole feli ba dekhe feli, next step hochhe arekta jinish bola ba dekha..... basic human nature,,,,,,, kintu dhoro, je kotha Ta tumi bolte parla na , ei "bolte na para Ta" onek din tumi dhore rakhba moner modhhey... u hold on to that feelings..... and keep that perception alive for a long time....
amra jodi mathematically time frame of feelings add korte thaki.... dekha jabe je, total time of happy moment is way less than sad moment... khub choto value ke amra mathematically jodi IGNORE kori and take the ABSOLUTE VALUE of the time frame of other feelings,, choto choto khonosthayee shukh guli shob 0+0+0 = 0 hoye jabe,,, shei hishebe out total life is a series of ABSOLUTE (na paowa + na dekha + na shona + NA BOLA + na chowa) .........

jaynto BILAI , jinishTa gift hishebe marattok ....ADDABAJ , BILAI gift korle picture upload koiro...tumi shesh porjonto gaach lagiyechila kina, sheTao janlam na.

[Gemini]

Friday
May 23rd. 2008
12:32 AM

Shondhay amar gaaye holud. Kemon jeno ajob ajob laagche....

[Addabaj]

Pinkey .... just love ya Api
CONGRATS Again

[rongon]

congrates !!!

[Gemini]

Thank you bhaiya and rongon

Saturday
May 24th, 2008
12:50 PM

Holude mojai hoyeche. Amar baba sharajibon amake ragiyechen ei bole je amar biyete uni nachben ebong jotobar bolechen ami totobar lafiyechhi. Kal shobar shamne dhore ene bolechi eibar nacho Tokhono shoshur barir keu eshe pouchayni. Mama, mami...cousins...even amar naniyo emon nachlo...hayre khoda It felt so good to see them enjoying. Er aage karo biyetei shobai ekshathe ebhabe hote pareni. Well amar biyeteo amar dui khala nai. Then again...amar nani tar kono nati/natnir biyetei kichu korte paren nai. Shesh porjonto amar tatei shobai joro hoye gelo!....

Amar babar barir attiyoshojon shob aj ke eshe pouchabe so bhebechilam amar holude keu thakbe na, shobai or holudei jabe. Hotath dekhi amar ek cousin ebong tar bou eshe pouchalo. They came all the way from Texas and didn't miss a thing....they were right on time! It felt so good....choto belar koto sriti ache ei bhaiyar shathe....bhaiya dhukei ammu abbu ke bollo "Priyanka-taro biye hoye gelo, haa?!" Shobar pokkhei kom beshi ektu obishashjoggo bepar...

Baba nijer haathe ghor bari shob shajiyechen...He did so much work...shesher deeke oboshsho amar bondhura help korechilo. Ora na thakle onek shomossha hoto...barir shamner alponar design koreche amar picchi bon raat 11 tar shomoye. Rong diyechi amra 3 friends...raat 2 ta porjonto. Hehehe it was funny to paint the whole thing myself because ami erokom kokhono dekhini. Baire besh thanda chilo tarporeo all I was wearing was jeans and a t-shirt. Rong korbo bole jeans abar hatu porjoto gutano. My parents were laughing at us but it was a lot of fun. Shesher deeke ekta rong shesh hoye giyechilo bole shokale uthe abar ene bakita shesh korechilam. It was fun.

Ami kokhonoi bhabini amake niye etto kichu hobe kokhono....wedding or whatever. Everything is happening well beyond my expectation. His parents sent me so many things...while his dad was sick and going through a kidney transplant. His sister worked on my wedding orna...I have no idea how she has done that work in that state. Etto choto choto detailing bhora kaj..prottekta pathor, sequinser kaj or kora. I can't even describe the other things. Bhebe bhalo laagche both of our parents are doing so much for us....abar kharap-o lagche je tara etto kichu korchen shobai. Amader ki eto kichu pawar kotha?

Kal amar reception...erpor ei bari te ei etota bochor jebhabe chilam sheybhabe ar thaka hobe nah. Bhabtei parchi na... Bhabteo chachhi nah. Shob cheye koshto lagche babar jonno jodiyo juddho ta comparatively tar shathei amar beshi hoyeche jibone. Bolar moto nah...Maayer shatheo hoyeche kom na. Dhutteri I don't wanna think about it. Kalker ta kalke dekha jabe.

Aaj oke holude dubano hobe...shobai bolche tuiyo chol giye surprise diye aay amar oi bhabi bollo bhaiya naki tar tae lukiye giyechilo. Amar fupu-o bhaiyatar shomoye taake phone kore bolechilo "Tuimyo lukiye chole asho " I personally would love to do that...to freak him out like that but dekha jaak.

I feel bad for my parents...duijon etto kichu korche, shob responsibilities eka eka. Tao bhalo amar shob mama mamira eikhane...we have neighbours and friends helping out. Amar gulo boddhoy 2/1 ghontar moddhei eshe pouchhabe. Ichha chilo shara raat kal adda marbo, holo na. Aaj raate hobe I can hardly wait. Shob kichu shesh kore ghumate jokhon gelam tokhon shurjo uthe jacchilo. Bhor shaare 4 ta porjonto adda merechi ammur shathe...tarpore shower kore ber hoye dekhi shaare 5 ta baje...akash ta ek odbhut neel

Aaj amader biyer 2 mash holo...wow. Sheyo ghumate giyeche 5 tae to nishchoy ekhono naak deke bari mathay kore rekheche Khochabo kina bhabchi.....hmmm

[rongon]

jao jao, holude jao.... disguise... moja paba... tomar hubby aro beshi moja pabe , tumi gele.......... biye bari'r chitro visulaize kore masti pachhi..... nijer alpona nije aaka Tao masti... hahah.

""Dhutteri I don't wanna think about it. Kalker ta kalke dekha jabe."" ...... kotha Ta valo laglo...... RECEPTION aro jom-jomaT hok......